Hello Everyone! Could it be coincidence or providence, that I should write the first edition of the Consima Circle (CC) on a day the world celebrates love? Whatever the reason may be, I’m happy the CC is here, because, wherever there is an event or a celebration, etiquette and/or protocol is involved, which is right up our street, as it were!
By way of introduction, CONSIMA is the acronym for ‘Consider It Made’. The Consima Protocol and Finishing School is just one of the aspects the company handles, but by and large, it all centers on protocol, etiquette and events. As time goes by, we shall fill you in with all you need to know in this regard. Our motto ‘Singulare Aude’ is Latin for ‘dare to be unique’, or ‘dare to distinguish yourself’, which speaks for itself. So welcome on board! To align with the mood and the season, this first edition is dedicated to the art of dating, or daring etiquette.
Once upon a time, knights in shining armors would fight to win the heart of a fair maiden… What did you say? Not in Nigeria? Well believe it or not, though you may not see young men strutting around on Broad Street, Lagos or leaning against the wall of the fountain in Millennium Park, Abuja there are still a number of people out there, who have found the 21st century adaptation to the word chivalry. Below are 10 tips for Him and for her, which will make you stand out from the crowd. ‘Singulare Aude’, remember? Dare to be different!
Dating Tips for Him
- Be punctual. This is the first rule of good manners, which also shows that you care. It is not cool to keep a lady waiting.
- Be the gentleman. Hold doors open for her. Open the car door for her to get in AND when she gets out. Always allow her to walk through a door first (while you hold it open).
- Be attentive. Don’t allow yourself to be distracted by your mobile phone, BBM messages of other interruptions. Let her know she is the center of your attention.
- Be courteous and pay sincere compliments. A lady takes a lot of time to prepare to go out on a date. Let her know that her efforts have paid off.
- Don’t make suggestive remarks. Don’t give the impression that you’re purely interested in getting physical, which is a complete turn-off. Show that you are interested in her as a person and that you enjoy her company.
- Be yourself. The worst thing to do is to try to impress a lady by showing off. You come across as phony. Let her discover who you are naturally. Then she’ll be really impressed.
- Be a good listener. You will gain some significant insights into the person your date is.
- Don’t take her to an all-night disco. It is impossible to make meaningful conversation over the din of the music. Enjoy a quiet meal first, and then you can go and dance.
- Be well groomed. Whether you wear a T-shirt and jeans or a tuxedo, make sure you are well turned-out, clean and in well ironed clothes. Your shoes must be clean and polished. Ensure your nails are clean and your hair is well combed.
- When your date indicates that she would like to go home, do not insist on prolonging the night. Take her home, tell her how much you enjoyed her company and if you promise to call her again, do so!
Dating Tips for Her
- Punctuality is the key. It shows that you are organized and considerate. If it takes you an hour to get ready, start an hour early, not when you hear the doorbell.
- Don’t experiment with make-up on a first date. It can have disastrous consequences.
- Do not wear tight-fitting clothes or show cleavage. It sends the wrong signals.
- Thank him when he pays you a compliment. Don’t try to play it down.
- Never talk about your ex-boyfriend.
- Don’t try to hide nervousness by playing with your mobile phone or sending text messages to your friends. Your mobile phone should remain in your handbag in silent mode.
- Relax, pay attention to your date, talk politely and enjoy his company.
- Let the natural flow of conversation dictate the date. Never dominate or force conversation.
- Avoid talking about yourself. It is inappropriate that your date know your entire family history and every detail about your previous relationships within the first 30 minutes.
- Thank him for a pleasant evening and if you’ve made the right impression, expect his call tomorrow…